Boat race halted by “crazed Marxist”
By James Rothwell
The Oxbridge Boat Race ground to a halt today after a young activist swam into the path of the athletes.
Thames Strategy Co-ordinator Trenton Oldfield, who is believed to be the saboteur, attempted to block the boats as an “act of civil disobedience”, forcing officials to restart the prestigious race from scratch.
It is the first time the Boat Race has been restarted in eleven years, and the first time the race has ever been disrupted by a swimmer.
A Marxist blog, believed to be Oldfield’s manifesto, states: “This is a protest, an act of civil disobedience, a methodology of refusing and resistance. This act has employed guerrilla tactics. I am swimming into the boats in the hope I can stop them from completing the race and proposing the return of surprise tactics.”
It continues: “This is ‘peaceful’ … I have no weapons (don’t shoot!) My only fear is not swimming fast enough to get in the right position to prevent the boats.”
The blog also encourages the public to engage in acts of civil disobedience, to bring down the “elitist” ruling classes of the United Kingdom.
The mysterious swimmer was apprehended by police shortly after leaving the water.
The Metropolitan police confirmed to the Daily Mail that “a man was arrested on suspicion of a public order offence and is currently in custody at a West London police station.”
Oxford University Boat Race Captain Karl Hudspith later tweeted: ” Finally to Tristan Oldfield: My team went through seven months of hell, this was the culmination of our careers and you took it from us.”
Cambridge went on to win the Boat Race, prompting outrage from Oxford students.
One finalist was “perturbed” by the outcome, which he deemed “unfair.”
“They gave Cambridge a bit of extra lee-way when they restarted [the race] and our team lost the psychological advantage,” he said.
“If that crazed Marxist hadn’t been flopping around in the water, we might have won.”
PHOTO/TaraMulholland
Ollie (Filthy Tab)
07/04/2012 at 19:04
Have to hand it to OUBC, if it weren’t for that Trenton shitbag you probably would have beaten us. +1 for an unofficial re-race.
Jacob
07/04/2012 at 20:24
Haha, what a legend. Just a bit of harmless fun, the rowers shouldn’t get so up themselves.
L
07/04/2012 at 20:41
He’s not a Marxist.
Justice
08/04/2012 at 00:48
No mention of the broken oar?
There’s no doubt the protester messed things up but the race was properly restarted and Cambridge rowed through fairly.
John Hicks
08/04/2012 at 12:58
Haha quoting the Daily Fail. Wave goodbye to your credibility.
Broken Oar
08/04/2012 at 15:17
Don’t forget about me!
Carol
08/04/2012 at 16:44
Its probably best not to put to much attention on it, but if you write anything more about the crazed marxist that ruined the competition, can you include in his discription, miserable – bitter – s.o.b marxist wanting to spoil things for other people? Also, can’t you all have some type of better security for these outings?